"For women are like roses; whose fair flower, Being Once displayed, doth fall that very hour" -William Shakespeare
Ok, so let me start this scenario at my practicum experience by writing that were 2 male practicum students in the office and one male staff person and one other female practicum student. All 4 are from different backgrounds, nationalities and cultures and all are at least six years older than me. It can be pretty funny sometimes. Today, I was working, not paying any attention to them. One Ethiopian guy says to me in the front room in his accent, and round about way of speaking (his english is perfect, but he has a different way of constructing sentences) "what about you Cheryl. You are that image, how do you do that?"
So you can imagine my "whaaaa? I don't know what you're asking"
As he began to talk some more about how I look, I realized that the last time I had payed any attention to the conversation they were talking about the Oscars. I guess they had progressed towards how celebreties work so hard to look a certain way, and he was wondering if I did the same thing to look my way. Eventually, the really Canadian blunt guy says, "like... do you starve yourself."
I of course turned bright red, not sure whether to be flattered or horrified.
Now Rico, always coming to my defense, says, "Yeah... Cheryl's thin. But she's fleshy thin." To which I turned redder. I was further pressed as to whether I dieted, which I said no. And they eventually got out of me that I exercize.
Earlier that day I walked from one room to the next and one student says, "Hello pretty woman" To which Rico agreed.
This is not even as bad as when Rico and I happened to be eating lunch at the same time and he said, "does this mean we are going to have dinner together some time" (I laugh it off) a few seconds later
"does this mean we are going to have breakfast together some time" (no response by me, how do you respond to that?)
Anyways, I could go on about the inappropriateness that occurs at this office, however, I think you get the point so I just stuck to the past couple of days. I'm having issues.
34 Comments:
Yes, it must be a trial to be pretty.
You say, "no," which you follow up with a solid knee to the groin or a good macing.
do what I do when people don't get hints.... grow a mustahce.
glue pieces of corn flakes to your face, and tell everyone you've got the plague!
on a more practical note, I think it's time to start cultivating a good quelling glare.
Now, it doesn't work on everybody, but generally if you're willing to keep it up to the point where they realize that they've crossed a line (ie. to the point of complete awkwardness), they start to get the idea.
glare, cheryl, glare.
It must be a trial to be you Mike.
I mean, "you're what they call, man-pretty"
Thanks for the helpful tips guys. Unfortunately, if it's one thing people don't get at this office it is body language. ie. glaring.
I can't grow a mustache, and according to one kid at LBE I already have one... so looking like corn flakes is the best option so far.
oh ya, and I'm not the type to knee kick a guy who already limps and can't see anything in his peripheral vision, so wouldn't be able to see it coming.
Riiiight... man-pretty Mike. That's what they call me.
I think that's the best time to knee a guy.
If you're really concerned then you need to either a) tell them it makes you uncomfortable, don't find that funny etc. or b) go to a supervisor with your concerns. Any half-decent supervisor will understand that such constant inappropiate comments in the work environment constitutes sexual harassment.
awwwww!! he's crippled! C'mon haven't you ever heard of the "Make a Wish Foundation"? I now vote you give this guy one date and make his wish come true.
don't listen to dave!
he's a crazy man.
perhaps you just need to up the intensity of your glare
If I have learned anything in life it is this...
If a guy is that forward/blunt, you need to be all the more forward/blunt/obvious with him. Guys like that don't get subtle hints/glares (glares may be seen as a sexy smouldering thing). I'm with Mike on this one.
This might be the first time anyone's agreed with me *wipes tear from his eye*
If you won't knee him, I will.
Yes Kimbee is right, the blunt ones are the one that are hardest to get the hint across with.
Example #1. Guy at work asks what I'm doing last friday night. I tell him me and a couple of girl friends are going to hear a local band play at a bar. He asks where. I say I don't know. He asks repeatedly (in clever different ways) until he gets it out of me. Then he invites himself along and asks if I can give him a ride. Yes, this is a true story. It was a wierd progression from "oh maybe I'll head down there for a bit" to "I'll meet you guys there later" to "so you'll be heading right past my place how about picking me up?" I heartily refused to give him a ride at which point he voiced the following arguments: "you'll be going right past my place it just makes sense. You're all about saving the environment it's better for the environment. I want to have a few drinks, you don't want me driving home drunk do you?"
That's when I had to put my foot down. I basically ended up telling him that there was no way I was going to pick him up and that I didn't even want him there. It was harsh I know but he really didn't give me any choice. Luckily I'm not working there anymore.
Oh by the way, I wasn't just being mean, this guy is not "just friends" material if you know what I mean.
"Dating me will save the planet"? Oh, I WISH I'd thought of that one when I was single!
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH that was a moment of sweet and hilarious confusion.
I saw Mike's shakespeare face the whole time I was reading Roslyn's comment, computer must of frozen his icon in front of hers. Anyways, I was like, Booth or Providence? and what did this guy want, to hit on Mike's girlfriends (girls that are friends) or to hit on mike. I was like, Mike how are you so calm about this. That guy came on to you! And since when are you vocally concerned about saving the environment
Dave, make a wish foundation sends dying people to disneyland and to meet celebrities,
they don't run an escort service.
Anyways, I think I've learned my lesson, from now on I'll be blunt. not even "friendly but not inviting" just blunt.
Well, I gotta tell you, Mike being hit on by guys is HILARIOUS! (if you're not Mike)
Good call Cheryl. Being "friendly but not inviting" gained me the flirting title in Bible school. Tee hee.
This is all reminding me of this male health care aide at work. There is a mentally challenged patient who has a big crush on him and tried to kiss his hand last week. He freaked and refused to go into this patient's room and asked our nurse manager to make sure he was never placed in the same unit as this patient. I laughed really hard when he told me because for one: he was being a big baby about it and for two: as a female in the health care profession (or any other for that matter) we have to put up with dirty old men and even there sons and grandsons hitting on us and being completely inappropriate on a fairly regular basis. Atleast this patient didn't grab his bum (though I wish she had and that I would have been there to see it). I should really post about that some day on my blog. Hmmm.....
YES ROSLYN YES! I love that story. My reply to this post reached blog-like proportions, so I posted it. wallowwallow.blogspot.com I also had already posted another, completely trivial, blog today. I'm pretty much bloggerific these days.
Wait, was this the greasy long-haired herpetic guy? Hahaha
...don't even answer that, I want to keep laughing inwardly at the very prospect
Well Cheryl it is basically like a meeting with a celebrity, after all "you are that image, how do you do that?"
bwahahahaha
He's not dying though... you got Dave's logic there
yes tom you are right on the ball (see Jeremy's blog where I said he was one shower, two teeth, and one bottle of valtrex away from being very good-looking)
Oh-he IS a different guy than the one who was making things all awkward back in summer by asking me out all the time. He eventually DID take the hint and we were able to continue on in a friendly way. He was not greasy.
Oh, the trials...
k i have obviously been missing out. This also reminded me of the "friendly but not inviting" experience on canoe trip when the glistening boys were trying to weasle their way onto our peninsula. It's funny becuae I think roslyn was on the side of advocating friendliness rather than just yelling "get away from us" and echoing all of twenty times from echo point on our peninsula. Rebekkah definately well represented the "not inviting" side of things and as we heard from Janelle a million times, she actually pulled off a good middle ground on "friendly but not inviting" Anyways, i'm proud of you roslyn, it kinda sounds like he really gave you no choice in the matter whatsoever. Also, Cheryl, tell that guy that because you're mennonite you only eat meat products before 9 am and do it in a large group of other mennonites every morning, in a barn. He's welcome to come if he wants but you excercize afterwards (hense your fleshy skinny bod) by plowing the earth. You seem to be good at doing things like that.
hey guess what? I read that just TODAY!! oh yes, I finished twelfth night for class today and lo and behold, came across that very quote!
uh, I was pretty excited.
and I agree with Mel completely - acting crazy seems to be your strong point. go with that.
i completely disagree.. under no circumstances should a women kick another man in the groin.. that does nothing, except like make us pretty much die. sheer ignoring and showing no interest what so ever even to be friends, would make me sulk and walk away.
I didn't say "kick." I said "knee." Slight difference, but a knee doesn't typically have the force of a kick. Something to do with fulcrums and physics, I suspect.
did "friendly but not inviting" somehow become a catch phrase while I was in the shower?
yes, yes it did. must have been a long shower.
it's from the epic canoe trip. it's too bad you're so out of the loop...
out there in bc
i suppose a knee would not be as harmful and perhaps work out in a positive way, for a woman.. but still unneccesary.
maybe if the knee was made of jello...
that would be awesome, i would eat mine.
AH HA HA HA HA
I was in Winnipeg when that canoe trip happened, I was just conveniently uninvited. Nonetheless, Jeremy is definitely going to bed sad tonight. Thanks Rebekah.
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